uneasy feeling

She was really trying not to get angry. To those here, a strange feeling and possible stalker who had done nothing but speak to her, likely wasn't at the top of their priority list. Yet, it was hard to stay calm when she felt strange and uneasy, and she had had CJ with her when that man approached.

How and why did he know Charlie, and why did he even care? The man left her years ago, a wound that had barely healed. Her son made that both so very difficult to deal with but helped the pain at the same time. In all honesty, she wished she had told the stranger that she didn't know and "didn't give a fuck", that she'd likely punch him if she ever saw him again. Instead, she had stood there in horror before managing to slip into the nearest store to safety.

In the middle of her pacing, so lost in thought, Alli had bumped into another, feeling the touch to her elbow as he steadied her. She was fumbling for an apology.

'-didn't see you there.'

"Seems like everyone here doesn't see-" Her words were cut off abruptly when those eyes rose up to the man's face. Allison drew in a sharp breath, yanking back her arm as she took a step back. Was she seeing things simply because she was thinking about him? Because she had to think about him now? But why here? Why was he...wearing a badge?

Blinking, he didn't disappear or happen to change into someone else, so she backpedaled another step. "Ch-Charlie...?" Her voice was both surprised and accusatory.

Shouldn't she be more shocked than this? Maybe her brain was still in denial at the cruel joke the universe decided it wanted to play. However, her hand still throbbed with how hard she had slapped him, a reaction that wasn't normal for her. He had taken her by surprise, bringing up that pain all over again that she just had the urge. She wanted to regret it, yet couldn't seem to bring herself to.

Still, she felt the sting of tears in her eyes and knew she wouldn't be able to hold this "tough bitch attitude" for much longer. This was too much.

Why was he here? None of it made sense because there was no way that he would have been able to earn a badge in the three years they were apart, and he hadn't mentioned it once...

'I'll take this Nancy.'

He really did work here. That badge was real. All of this was real. What the fuck was happening? Before she could dwell on it any longer, he was drawing her away from the desk, using her last name so formally that it was just another knife stabbing her in the heart. It was enough to shock her and not make her immediately yank her arm away again right away.

When he let her go, Allison immediately stopped walking, staring at his retreating back until (or if) he decided to stop to face her. "Because you're an officer," she answered flatly, her tone biting. "That entire time, you just-" Lips pressed tightly together in thought, holding in a sigh as she stepped back to lean against the hallway wall. "You just lied." Through all of this, maybe she should have understood why but she was struggling to think straight.

Then, suddenly, those hazel-green eyes widened just a little bit as she looked back to him. Her anger was seeping back. "So, that man on the street was looking for you. Despite the fact that I've been nothing for the last few years- what the fuck, Charlie?"

Keep it together, Allison. Remember where you are. You need to get back to CJ.

CJ. Charlie didn't know about the boy, and now that she felt that knife just dig deeper, she was feeling too spiteful to tell him. And what did it matter? She had taken care of her son this entire time without him.

'I never lied to you, save for the end.'

That happened to draw all the breath from her lungs, and she leaned there, staring at him for a long moment before she finally blinked. For a second, she wanted to cling to that feeling of hope, but she felt nothing but sadness now, nothing but that heartache.

"The end-" she repeated quietly. "Right. But you've been here...for however long, and I didn't even know. You didn't even-" She just stopped herself. You didn't even reach out to me, she nearly said. Allison wanted to believed those words of his, but it was clear that she didn't, or simply wouldn't allow herself to. He let her go, for whatever the reason, and that was all there was to it. Having an argument about it in a building full of cops wasn't the best of time, and yet she suspected this would be the last time she even saw him. Again.

She felt her throat closing up, and had to force herself to stand up straight. It was crazy just to be looking at him, like this was a dream, and she could feel nothing but pain.

His sudden shock and anger made the unease return, and she swallowed hard. Suddenly, he was bombarding her with questions, and she was struggling to remain irritated with him. The last thing she wanted to do was talk to Charlie any further about anything, but the fact that she had her son when the stranger approached was what made her reply. "I...I don't know. Hispanic? He was wearing shades, had this...tribal tattoo on his neck." A wave of her hand brushed away his questions about being hurt. He hadn't touched them, or she hadn't given him the chance to.

To hear him confess to being an undercover cop only seemed to strike the wound harder. Those tears stung more at the corners of her eyes and she had to draw in a staggered breath. "That's...all I know. That's all that happened," she managed to finally say, her voice quiet.

Charlie claimed to have never lied to her, and yet his very existence had been a lie to her. How much of him had really been him? Was she staring at a complete stranger right now?

Were she still not so shocked by the fact that he was here, that he had lied to her, Allison might have understood better. Still, he had abandoned her. No, he had abandoned them. What would he have done if he'd known she had been pregnant while he broke her heart? Maybe it was just better this way.

Only, she wasn't quite sure how she was going to easily move on from this once he let her go again.

Lips pressed together as she nodded in response, clearly wanting to say something else but was refraining. "Right. Of course." Charlie wouldn't have sought her out, not after all of this time. That was what she believed and she really wished he wasn't trying to soften the blow. That wound had healed already, or so she was telling herself.

He was asking her questions again, and she struggles to remember. A scar, devil tattoo? "I-I don't know about the scar...maybe the tattoo." Alli was suddenly annoyed with herself because she was becoming flustered over trying to remember. Charlie wasn't making this easy, simply by being there.

Perhaps she was being overly paranoid, remembering things that hadn't been there because Charlie was putting the ideas in her head. But the one thing she knew, was that she had been scared. And still was.

He was touching her again, and this time, she gently pulled her arm away but still followed him. Although she agreed to look at the photo, she didn't trust herself, didn't want him to be so close. This was all a shock and confusing as is, and he would only cloud her judgement more. She would only tell him everything he had missed when he left her...

"What's going on, Charlie? I get to know the truth now, don't I?" Her tone still bit, but it had lessened from before. This was her way of trying to hide how scared she actually was.

This was so surreal. It still felt strange and like some strange fantasy she was dreaming up. And yet, the pain she felt was certainly real. Allison couldn't ignore that, and it was making it increasingly difficult to keep herself together. It had been three years- three years since he left, and here he was...as something he wasn't supposed to be, telling her things that she would have loved to hear all that time ago. But now? Now it was hard to believe him.

She had taken that seat and listened to him, staring at nothing in particular upon that desk. He was telling her the job, that she was a distraction, and she felt her throat close up. All she heard was that she was simply a part of his cover, to help sell it, make it more believable. 'We weren't supposed to happen, he had said, and for a moment she wished they never had.

At his pause, something made Alli look up at him, only realizing in that very moment that her vision was blurred by unshed tears. Still, she clenched her jaws, holding onto what little strength she had left.

'I don't regret it. Not you. Ever.'

Allison stopped breathing for a moment, but this feeling of elation was gone the moment he leaned back and continued to speak. He didn't regret it, but he still left her in the dark. He still left her alone, broken, and pregnant with his child. The thought of CJ was what made a couple of those tears fall down her cheeks, but she was quick to wipe them away.

She couldn't do this now. This wasn't a conversation she wanted to have right now, or maybe ever. What was the point? A couple of years had already passed, and things had changed. Charlie was literally not the person she thought she knew.

For a moment, she thought she might be sick.

'It was for your safety Alli. So they left you alone. Any connection to me, puts you in danger.'

"Yeah, well, it's starting to feel like your plan backfired," she said quietly. Despite her tears, her voice still managed to remain strong; clinging to that attitude that she needed to make it through this. She prayed this all amounted to nothing, though. She did not want to be involved.

When Charlie pulled the photo out, she dragged it closer so that she could get a better look. It only took her a second before there was a gentle, sharp intake of breath. That was definitely the tattoo. She recalled the man being wirey, almost skeevy with the way he approached her...even if she couldn't see his eyes, she could feel them assessing her. Now she knew why.

Allison shoved the photo away and just nodded. "He approached us-" A quick pause before she barely skipped a beat to correct herself. "-me downtown. I rushed into the dry cleaners and waited for him to go. He...was asking how you were doing." After a moment, those eyes rose back up to him; pain written all over her face. "This...isn't going to go away, is it?" It was more than just a weirdo on the street. This was danger, and Allison was trying to wrap her head around it.